1 00:00:05,788 --> 00:00:06,789 So, 2 00:00:06,832 --> 00:00:08,791 two keys, huh? 3 00:00:08,834 --> 00:00:10,314 That's a lot of snow. 4 00:00:10,358 --> 00:00:11,533 And if you can't handle it, 5 00:00:11,576 --> 00:00:13,274 we're happy to find someone who can. 6 00:00:13,317 --> 00:00:15,319 Don't worry about me, friend. I can handle it. 7 00:00:15,363 --> 00:00:17,017 Marissa, baby, 8 00:00:17,060 --> 00:00:18,603 go get our guests something to drink, would you? 9 00:00:18,627 --> 00:00:20,300 - We don't want a drink. - What is this, a social call? 10 00:00:20,324 --> 00:00:22,022 - It's not a tea party. - We look like 11 00:00:22,065 --> 00:00:23,521 five-year-old girls to you? Gentlemen, please. 12 00:00:23,545 --> 00:00:25,242 Have some patience. 13 00:00:25,286 --> 00:00:27,027 Two keys. 14 00:00:27,070 --> 00:00:28,724 Pure as a Catholic schoolgirl. 15 00:00:28,767 --> 00:00:30,465 Did you bring the cash? 16 00:00:30,508 --> 00:00:32,356 Oh, we brought something much better than cash. 17 00:00:32,380 --> 00:00:33,729 - What is that? - Our guns! 18 00:00:33,772 --> 00:00:35,252 NYPD! You're under arrest! 19 00:00:45,132 --> 00:00:47,351 Boss man's gone. Where'd he go? 20 00:00:50,572 --> 00:00:52,574 Thank you kindly, little lady. 21 00:00:59,146 --> 00:01:00,538 Gio Costa, 22 00:01:00,582 --> 00:01:02,279 you're under arrest. 23 00:01:02,323 --> 00:01:03,691 You want that drink now, Hitchcock? 24 00:01:03,715 --> 00:01:05,065 Don't mind if I do, Scully. 25 00:01:05,108 --> 00:01:06,501 Don't mind if I do. 26 00:01:32,831 --> 00:01:34,311 What the hell, Diaz? 27 00:01:34,355 --> 00:01:36,183 You trying to make your heart explode? 28 00:01:36,226 --> 00:01:37,595 I'm loading up on coffee because it's a pain in the ass 29 00:01:37,619 --> 00:01:38,794 getting to the kitchen now, 30 00:01:38,837 --> 00:01:39,901 and I don't want to come back here. 31 00:01:39,925 --> 00:01:41,405 Is this about the desks? 32 00:01:41,449 --> 00:01:43,755 Yes, Terry, it's about the desks. 33 00:01:43,799 --> 00:01:45,603 How long is Commissioner Kelly going to punish us 34 00:01:45,627 --> 00:01:47,561 because Captain Holt complained about him to the mayor? 35 00:01:47,585 --> 00:01:49,152 I don't know, but I hope it ends soon. 36 00:01:49,196 --> 00:01:51,285 Terry's shoulders weren't built for tight spaces. 37 00:01:51,328 --> 00:01:52,851 It's bonk city in here! 38 00:01:52,895 --> 00:01:54,264 I've said "excuse me" more times this morning 39 00:01:54,288 --> 00:01:56,246 than I have in my entire life. 40 00:01:56,290 --> 00:01:57,595 Twice! 41 00:02:00,642 --> 00:02:02,209 - Jake. - Rosa. 42 00:02:06,169 --> 00:02:07,431 Good morning. 43 00:02:07,475 --> 00:02:08,800 Oh, my. We are very close together. 44 00:02:08,824 --> 00:02:10,217 I love it. Hey, 45 00:02:10,260 --> 00:02:11,218 you know how I've always wanted 46 00:02:11,261 --> 00:02:12,219 to have another child? 47 00:02:12,262 --> 00:02:13,568 Well, it's happening! 48 00:02:13,611 --> 00:02:14,786 Genevieve is pregnant? 49 00:02:14,830 --> 00:02:16,266 But I thought your "meh-err" 50 00:02:16,310 --> 00:02:17,746 no longer made "whoo-oo." 51 00:02:17,789 --> 00:02:19,791 Correct. My testes no longer make sperm. 52 00:02:19,835 --> 00:02:21,465 I was good with "meh-err" and "whoo-oo." 53 00:02:21,489 --> 00:02:22,553 No, we're thinking of adopting again. 54 00:02:22,577 --> 00:02:23,839 We just got an email 55 00:02:23,882 --> 00:02:25,754 from Nikolaj's 15-year-old brother 56 00:02:25,797 --> 00:02:27,190 in Latvia that he's never met. 57 00:02:27,234 --> 00:02:28,887 Yeah, his name is Dragomir. 58 00:02:28,931 --> 00:02:30,367 Oh, my God. 59 00:02:30,411 --> 00:02:32,413 That is a 42-year-old fur trapper. 60 00:02:32,456 --> 00:02:34,154 What? You don't see the resemblance? 61 00:02:34,197 --> 00:02:36,591 Yeah, to Matisyahu. There's no way he's 15. 62 00:02:36,634 --> 00:02:38,221 Well, then, how come he wrote that his greatest fear 63 00:02:38,245 --> 00:02:40,160 is "going through puberty"? 64 00:02:40,203 --> 00:02:41,354 Probably because he wants you to think he's 15 65 00:02:41,378 --> 00:02:42,510 so you'll adopt him. 66 00:02:42,553 --> 00:02:43,748 Look, Charles, I hate to say this, 67 00:02:43,772 --> 00:02:45,295 but I think this guy is scamming you. 68 00:02:45,339 --> 00:02:46,577 Come on. You're just suspicious 69 00:02:46,601 --> 00:02:47,863 - of everyone. - Jake! 70 00:02:47,906 --> 00:02:49,299 Charles! 71 00:02:49,343 --> 00:02:50,953 Captain wants to see you! 72 00:02:50,996 --> 00:02:53,564 I cannot get through this room anymore, 73 00:02:53,608 --> 00:02:55,175 so I'm yelling everything now. 74 00:02:55,218 --> 00:02:57,568 Nancy, Captain said you can 75 00:02:57,612 --> 00:02:59,614 go to your psychologist this morning. 76 00:02:59,657 --> 00:03:01,659 You're clear! Get your head right. 77 00:03:01,703 --> 00:03:03,574 Gentlemen, we have a situation. 78 00:03:03,618 --> 00:03:05,596 Scully and Hitchcock just got a call from Internal Affairs. 79 00:03:05,620 --> 00:03:08,362 They're interested in a case of theirs from 1986. 80 00:03:08,405 --> 00:03:11,191 If you ask me, this old case is only coming up now 81 00:03:11,234 --> 00:03:12,583 because the commissioner is trying 82 00:03:12,627 --> 00:03:14,455 to drum up a scandal in the Nine-Nine. 83 00:03:14,498 --> 00:03:16,650 And take out your two best detectives in the process. 84 00:03:16,674 --> 00:03:17,782 You're not my two best detectives. 85 00:03:17,806 --> 00:03:19,329 Oh, that's such a relief. 86 00:03:19,373 --> 00:03:20,591 I feel so much safer now. 87 00:03:20,635 --> 00:03:22,376 - Good lord. - Don't interfere 88 00:03:22,419 --> 00:03:23,942 with IA's investigation. Just find out 89 00:03:23,986 --> 00:03:25,596 what actually happened 90 00:03:25,640 --> 00:03:27,487 in case Kelly is trying to manipulate the facts. 91 00:03:27,511 --> 00:03:28,860 Can you do that? 92 00:03:28,904 --> 00:03:29,968 Oh, so you're asking if we can open a portal 93 00:03:29,992 --> 00:03:31,515 to the wet and wild 1980s 94 00:03:31,559 --> 00:03:32,840 to investigation the bizarre lives 95 00:03:32,864 --> 00:03:34,388 of these magnificent dodos? 96 00:03:34,431 --> 00:03:36,346 I believe it was a young Barack Obama 97 00:03:36,390 --> 00:03:38,914 who said "Uh, yes, we can." 98 00:03:38,957 --> 00:03:40,829 Ooh, sorry. Sorry. 99 00:03:40,872 --> 00:03:43,223 Sorry. You want to see me, sarge? 100 00:03:43,266 --> 00:03:44,398 Yeah. I know we're all 101 00:03:44,441 --> 00:03:45,877 sort of crammed together in here, 102 00:03:45,921 --> 00:03:47,531 but we were kind of thinking 103 00:03:47,575 --> 00:03:49,011 that your uniformed officers 104 00:03:49,054 --> 00:03:50,839 are, uh, causing some problems. 105 00:03:50,882 --> 00:03:52,406 Oh? Like what? 106 00:03:52,449 --> 00:03:53,885 How do I put this tactfully? 107 00:03:53,929 --> 00:03:55,559 Your squad turned the kitchen into a cesspool, 108 00:03:55,583 --> 00:03:56,821 nastied up the bathroom, and made the elevator 109 00:03:56,845 --> 00:03:58,281 smell like a hundred butts. 110 00:03:58,325 --> 00:04:00,240 Okay, thank you for your tact, Diaz. 111 00:04:00,283 --> 00:04:01,826 Well, that's unfair. Your squad is responsible 112 00:04:01,850 --> 00:04:03,939 for at least 50 of those butts. 113 00:04:03,982 --> 00:04:05,419 Look, all I'm saying is maybe 114 00:04:05,462 --> 00:04:06,570 you can ask the downstairs people 115 00:04:06,594 --> 00:04:07,551 - to be more... - Excuse me? 116 00:04:07,595 --> 00:04:09,249 "Downstairs people"? 117 00:04:09,292 --> 00:04:10,989 That's a little offensive. 118 00:04:11,033 --> 00:04:13,253 Oh, don't get it twisted. 119 00:04:13,296 --> 00:04:14,732 It's just where you came from. 120 00:04:14,776 --> 00:04:16,604 Some of my best friends are downstairs people. 121 00:04:16,647 --> 00:04:20,347 Okay, I think you know exactly what that sounds like, 122 00:04:20,390 --> 00:04:22,479 you upstairs people. 123 00:04:22,523 --> 00:04:24,022 Oh, thank you for that nice compliment. 124 00:04:24,046 --> 00:04:25,545 It wasn't a compliment, and you know it! 125 00:04:25,569 --> 00:04:26,701 I said it with 'tude. 126 00:04:26,744 --> 00:04:28,485 Classic downstairs person. 127 00:04:28,529 --> 00:04:31,923 Wow, you are prejudiced against the first floor. 128 00:04:31,967 --> 00:04:34,361 I'm taking this up the chain. 129 00:04:34,404 --> 00:04:36,580 Gina Linetti spaghetti confetti. 130 00:04:36,624 --> 00:04:38,582 Gina Linetti spaghetti confetti. 131 00:04:38,626 --> 00:04:40,410 - Faster. - GinaLinettispaghetticonfetti. 132 00:04:40,454 --> 00:04:41,779 - Captain Holt. - Uh, yeah, can't you see 133 00:04:41,803 --> 00:04:42,910 we're in the middle of something? 134 00:04:42,934 --> 00:04:44,414 Sorry. It sounded like you were 135 00:04:44,458 --> 00:04:46,373 just saying gibberish back and forth. 136 00:04:46,416 --> 00:04:47,785 Gina is helping me to prepare for a televised interview. 137 00:04:47,809 --> 00:04:49,332 Since the mayor has yet 138 00:04:49,376 --> 00:04:50,657 to weigh in on Commissioner Kelly's. 139 00:04:50,681 --> 00:04:52,335 "Vigilant Policing" initiative, 140 00:04:52,379 --> 00:04:53,443 I've decided to take my objections 141 00:04:53,467 --> 00:04:54,772 straight to the people. 142 00:04:54,816 --> 00:04:57,340 And this gibberish is actually Gina jargon, 143 00:04:57,384 --> 00:04:59,037 a world-renowned linguistic system 144 00:04:59,081 --> 00:05:00,996 that worked pretty well for Ellen Musk. 145 00:05:01,039 --> 00:05:02,954 - Elon Musk. - Ellen Musk. 146 00:05:02,998 --> 00:05:06,044 Season one winner of VH1's "Queen Bitch." 147 00:05:06,088 --> 00:05:07,655 Sir, isn't going to the press 148 00:05:07,698 --> 00:05:09,309 going to make Kelly even angrier at us? 149 00:05:09,352 --> 00:05:10,875 Yeah. He's already made life here 150 00:05:10,919 --> 00:05:13,487 pretty miserable. The crowding, the desks, 151 00:05:13,530 --> 00:05:15,793 the downstairs people treating the bullpen 152 00:05:15,837 --> 00:05:17,404 like a dumpster. 153 00:05:17,447 --> 00:05:20,537 Ooh, I'm so sorry for the untidiness, milord. 154 00:05:20,581 --> 00:05:21,645 That's enough. I don't have time 155 00:05:21,669 --> 00:05:22,887 for your internecine battles, 156 00:05:22,931 --> 00:05:24,019 and I don't give a hoot 157 00:05:24,062 --> 00:05:25,673 about your minor inconveniences. 158 00:05:25,716 --> 00:05:27,631 I am trying to fight injustice 159 00:05:27,675 --> 00:05:30,852 and do what is right for the entire NYPD. 160 00:05:30,895 --> 00:05:32,419 Understood? 161 00:05:32,462 --> 00:05:35,378 Yes, milord. 162 00:05:35,422 --> 00:05:37,641 Okay, let's set the scene. 163 00:05:37,685 --> 00:05:39,077 The year is 1986. 164 00:05:39,121 --> 00:05:40,818 "Top Gun" is crushing the box office, 165 00:05:40,862 --> 00:05:42,516 and the Beastie Boys have just been issued 166 00:05:42,559 --> 00:05:44,561 their "License to Ill." And that's the year 167 00:05:44,605 --> 00:05:45,997 I got felt up for the first time 168 00:05:46,041 --> 00:05:48,043 under the shirt. Always a big moment 169 00:05:48,086 --> 00:05:49,412 in a young boy's life. All right, tell us 170 00:05:49,436 --> 00:05:50,567 about the case. 171 00:05:50,611 --> 00:05:51,849 We were working organized crime, 172 00:05:51,873 --> 00:05:53,831 and we took down a mafia boss, Gio Costa, 173 00:05:53,875 --> 00:05:55,398 for running cocaine. 174 00:05:55,442 --> 00:05:56,854 We were the studs of the Nine-Nine. 175 00:05:56,878 --> 00:05:58,836 Well, I'm sure "studs" is a bit of a... 176 00:05:58,880 --> 00:05:59,944 Oh, my God. I can't believe 177 00:05:59,968 --> 00:06:01,099 I'ma say this, but... 178 00:06:01,143 --> 00:06:02,971 Meow. 179 00:06:03,014 --> 00:06:05,016 No, that is not what I was gonna say, 180 00:06:05,060 --> 00:06:06,844 but honestly, yeah, meow. 181 00:06:06,888 --> 00:06:09,020 No offense, guys, but what the hell happened to you? 182 00:06:09,064 --> 00:06:10,413 Are you body shaming us? 183 00:06:10,457 --> 00:06:12,023 No, I'm personality-shaming you. 184 00:06:12,067 --> 00:06:14,417 You were so alert and cool and job-doing. 185 00:06:14,461 --> 00:06:15,853 So how did you get to Costa? 186 00:06:15,897 --> 00:06:17,115 We had a CI on the inside 187 00:06:17,159 --> 00:06:18,116 who helped set up a sting. 188 00:06:18,160 --> 00:06:19,596 We took down Costa, 189 00:06:19,640 --> 00:06:20,945 recovered a ton of coke 190 00:06:20,989 --> 00:06:22,643 and three duffel bags full of cash. 191 00:06:22,686 --> 00:06:23,948 Seems pretty clear-cut, 192 00:06:23,992 --> 00:06:25,515 but then why would IA reopen the case? 193 00:06:25,559 --> 00:06:27,082 Unless... they think it's some sort 194 00:06:27,125 --> 00:06:29,060 of "Freaky Friday" situation and you guys traded places 195 00:06:29,084 --> 00:06:30,694 with horny singles in your area. 196 00:06:30,738 --> 00:06:32,538 - It's possible. - So what happened to the CI? 197 00:06:32,566 --> 00:06:34,132 Who knows? It was so long ago. 198 00:06:34,176 --> 00:06:36,439 I mean, I barely remember how I got to work this morning. 199 00:06:36,483 --> 00:06:37,764 I think there was an ambulance involved. 200 00:06:37,788 --> 00:06:39,007 - Oh, there was. - Oh. 201 00:06:39,050 --> 00:06:40,487 Wait a minute. Here's a question. 202 00:06:40,530 --> 00:06:41,749 You said you recovered 203 00:06:41,792 --> 00:06:43,446 three duffel bags full of cash, 204 00:06:43,490 --> 00:06:44,597 and that's what the evidence logs say as well. 205 00:06:44,621 --> 00:06:45,579 - Yeah. - So? 206 00:06:45,622 --> 00:06:47,450 So count the bags. 207 00:06:47,494 --> 00:06:49,191 One, two, three, like you said, 208 00:06:49,234 --> 00:06:50,995 but then take a look in this mirror behind you, 209 00:06:51,019 --> 00:06:53,064 the one that shows off your shockingly taut bottoms. 210 00:06:53,108 --> 00:06:54,718 A fourth bag. 211 00:06:54,762 --> 00:06:55,980 Oh, probably missed it. 212 00:06:56,024 --> 00:06:57,721 Yeah, you know us. We're dumb-dumbs. 213 00:06:57,765 --> 00:07:00,071 But even you wouldn't miss a giant bag full of cash. 214 00:07:00,115 --> 00:07:01,962 - It was the '80s. - Police weren't perfect then 215 00:07:01,986 --> 00:07:03,814 like they are today. All right, calm down. 216 00:07:03,858 --> 00:07:05,488 We're not accusing you of anything, right, Jake? 217 00:07:05,512 --> 00:07:07,078 - Kinda was. - This is crazy! 218 00:07:07,122 --> 00:07:08,906 We're innocent! IA is railroading us 219 00:07:08,950 --> 00:07:11,518 like Holt said, and you're joining in the witch hunt! 220 00:07:11,561 --> 00:07:12,910 You're fake news! 221 00:07:12,954 --> 00:07:14,434 Sad! 222 00:07:16,174 --> 00:07:19,047 Yeah, that's definitely the language of the innocent. 223 00:07:21,658 --> 00:07:24,008 Okay, so there are two questions on the table. 224 00:07:24,052 --> 00:07:25,246 First, who was more bang-able, 225 00:07:25,270 --> 00:07:26,550 young Hitchcock or young Scully? 226 00:07:26,576 --> 00:07:28,012 Young Hitchcock. Total smoke show. 227 00:07:28,056 --> 00:07:29,425 Agreed, but it's close, and second, 228 00:07:29,449 --> 00:07:31,320 did they steal a big old bag full of mob cash? 229 00:07:31,363 --> 00:07:32,582 They said they didn't do 230 00:07:32,626 --> 00:07:33,975 anything wrong. I believe them. 231 00:07:34,018 --> 00:07:34,976 When I brought up the fourth bag, 232 00:07:35,019 --> 00:07:36,107 they stormed out. 233 00:07:36,151 --> 00:07:37,587 Or, once again, I think 234 00:07:37,631 --> 00:07:39,197 you just can't help being suspicious 235 00:07:39,241 --> 00:07:40,677 - of everyone. - Oh, my God. 236 00:07:40,721 --> 00:07:42,307 Is that what this is about? You're mad because I said 237 00:07:42,331 --> 00:07:43,656 the old sea captain you want to adopt 238 00:07:43,680 --> 00:07:45,290 is scamming you? 239 00:07:45,334 --> 00:07:47,094 Dragomir is not a captain. He clubs the fish 240 00:07:47,118 --> 00:07:49,009 in the bottom of the boat. That's his after-school job. 241 00:07:49,033 --> 00:07:50,228 Okay, Charles, you are letting your emotions 242 00:07:50,252 --> 00:07:51,403 cloud your judgment with Dragomir 243 00:07:51,427 --> 00:07:52,689 and with these guys. 244 00:07:52,733 --> 00:07:54,232 I mean, for all we know, Hitchcock and Scully 245 00:07:54,256 --> 00:07:55,320 have been playing us for years 246 00:07:55,344 --> 00:07:56,432 like criminal masterminds. 247 00:07:58,173 --> 00:07:59,740 Okay, so maybe not masterminds, 248 00:07:59,783 --> 00:08:01,761 but I'm still going in there and getting the truth. 249 00:08:01,785 --> 00:08:03,308 All right, guys, let's not make this 250 00:08:03,352 --> 00:08:04,634 any more difficult than it has to be. 251 00:08:04,658 --> 00:08:06,157 We know there was a fourth bag of money. 252 00:08:06,181 --> 00:08:07,617 Where'd it go? We told you dorks. 253 00:08:07,661 --> 00:08:09,706 We never saw it. Now leave us alone. 254 00:08:09,750 --> 00:08:11,336 I don't think you get what's happening here. 255 00:08:11,360 --> 00:08:12,492 This is an interrogation, 256 00:08:12,535 --> 00:08:14,145 and it's only gonna end one way: 257 00:08:14,189 --> 00:08:15,625 With you telling us everything. 258 00:08:15,669 --> 00:08:17,497 Something funny? 259 00:08:17,540 --> 00:08:19,562 It's just I don't think you get what's happening here. 260 00:08:19,586 --> 00:08:21,631 You're locked in a small, windowless room 261 00:08:21,675 --> 00:08:23,328 with the two of us one hour after lunch. 262 00:08:23,372 --> 00:08:24,329 - Oh no. - You want to know 263 00:08:24,373 --> 00:08:25,461 what we ate? 264 00:08:25,505 --> 00:08:26,743 Four-cheese pizza, double-cheese, 265 00:08:26,767 --> 00:08:29,160 with a side of cheesy fries, extra cheese, 266 00:08:29,204 --> 00:08:30,553 and a big old slice of cheesecake. 267 00:08:30,597 --> 00:08:32,642 But, Scully, 268 00:08:32,686 --> 00:08:34,470 you're lactose intolerant. Yeah. 269 00:08:34,514 --> 00:08:38,648 This whole room is a Dutch oven. 270 00:08:38,692 --> 00:08:40,345 What the hell is this? 271 00:08:40,389 --> 00:08:41,738 The downstairs people 272 00:08:41,782 --> 00:08:43,740 keep making a mess of the microwave. 273 00:08:43,784 --> 00:08:45,350 One of them thought it was cool 274 00:08:45,394 --> 00:08:47,570 to heat up soup in an uncovered dish. 275 00:08:47,614 --> 00:08:49,485 That's just crazy! How do you know 276 00:08:49,529 --> 00:08:50,680 that's our splatter? There are some 277 00:08:50,704 --> 00:08:52,401 sloppy Susans upstairs. 278 00:08:52,444 --> 00:08:54,142 I saw it go down. It was one of you, 279 00:08:54,185 --> 00:08:55,622 - so ya banned. - No way. 280 00:08:55,665 --> 00:08:58,102 This microwave belongs to the entire precinct, 281 00:08:58,146 --> 00:09:00,148 so I'm nah-banned. 282 00:09:00,191 --> 00:09:02,324 Actually, turns out, this microwave 283 00:09:02,367 --> 00:09:03,673 is not precinct property. 284 00:09:03,717 --> 00:09:05,545 Detective O'Shea brought it from home 285 00:09:05,588 --> 00:09:07,590 - back in '98, so... - Ya banned. 286 00:09:07,634 --> 00:09:09,374 I went to visit O'Shea's widow. 287 00:09:09,418 --> 00:09:10,506 - He's dead? - Big-time. 288 00:09:10,550 --> 00:09:11,725 She is not over it. 289 00:09:11,768 --> 00:09:14,292 Anyway, I got her to sign a contract 290 00:09:14,336 --> 00:09:16,599 that states the upstairs has exclusive 291 00:09:16,643 --> 00:09:18,166 microwave rights. 292 00:09:18,209 --> 00:09:19,646 You bothered a widow with this? 293 00:09:19,689 --> 00:09:21,473 Honestly, it wasn't that awkward for me. 294 00:09:21,517 --> 00:09:22,605 Rosa did it. 295 00:09:22,649 --> 00:09:24,259 It was rough, but she signed it, 296 00:09:24,302 --> 00:09:25,695 so ya banned. 297 00:09:25,739 --> 00:09:27,741 Okay, now that we can all breathe, 298 00:09:27,784 --> 00:09:29,501 let's try this again, unless you want to try 299 00:09:29,525 --> 00:09:30,763 and stink up the entire city of New York. 300 00:09:30,787 --> 00:09:32,572 Challenge accepted. 301 00:09:32,615 --> 00:09:34,138 Okay, everyone, be cool! Be cool! 302 00:09:34,182 --> 00:09:35,376 Just tell me everything that happened 303 00:09:35,400 --> 00:09:36,401 after the bust. 304 00:09:36,445 --> 00:09:37,465 I'll tell you what happened. 305 00:09:37,489 --> 00:09:38,839 We were frigging heroes. 306 00:09:38,882 --> 00:09:40,710 Anybody have a trash can? 307 00:09:40,754 --> 00:09:43,365 'Cause Flat Top and the Freak are bringing in some garbage. 308 00:09:45,497 --> 00:09:47,108 You guys had badass entrance lines 309 00:09:47,151 --> 00:09:48,413 and people cheered? 310 00:09:48,457 --> 00:09:50,285 What happened? Where'd it all go wrong? 311 00:09:50,328 --> 00:09:51,728 Some things aren't for us to know. 312 00:09:51,765 --> 00:09:54,115 Look, guys, we never had that money. 313 00:09:54,158 --> 00:09:55,638 Here. We'll prove it to you. 314 00:09:55,682 --> 00:09:57,379 Those are our financial records. 315 00:09:57,422 --> 00:09:59,618 I don't have any retirement. I don't have any security, 316 00:09:59,642 --> 00:10:00,643 or a car. 317 00:10:00,687 --> 00:10:02,253 I rent most of my clothes. 318 00:10:02,297 --> 00:10:03,254 We get it. You're poor. 319 00:10:03,298 --> 00:10:05,256 I'm not just poor, son. 320 00:10:05,300 --> 00:10:06,649 I'm destitute. 321 00:10:06,693 --> 00:10:08,390 Definitely not a wink-able line. 322 00:10:08,433 --> 00:10:09,889 Ugh, look at all these credit card charges 323 00:10:09,913 --> 00:10:11,567 for Wing Slutz. 324 00:10:11,611 --> 00:10:12,762 It can't be healthy to eat there this much. 325 00:10:12,786 --> 00:10:14,396 If you want a diet option, 326 00:10:14,439 --> 00:10:16,287 the Marine Park location has a blue cheese parfait. 327 00:10:16,311 --> 00:10:18,289 You guys go all the way down to Marine Park for wings? 328 00:10:18,313 --> 00:10:19,551 There's a waitress there who always gives us 329 00:10:19,575 --> 00:10:20,750 an extra drumstick 330 00:10:20,794 --> 00:10:22,447 in our slut bucket. Wait a minute. 331 00:10:22,491 --> 00:10:23,903 Why do you pay for a monthly parking spot? 332 00:10:23,927 --> 00:10:25,557 Because it's New York. It's hard to park. 333 00:10:25,581 --> 00:10:26,906 Yeah, but he just said he doesn't have a car. 334 00:10:26,930 --> 00:10:28,366 So what's parked in this spot 335 00:10:28,410 --> 00:10:29,759 you don't want us to know about? 336 00:10:29,803 --> 00:10:32,675 Could it be a super-expensive sports car, 337 00:10:32,719 --> 00:10:34,242 paid for in cash? 338 00:10:34,285 --> 00:10:35,460 Nope. 339 00:10:35,504 --> 00:10:37,245 It's just a sketchy old sex van. 340 00:10:37,288 --> 00:10:39,682 There is nothing sketchy about the Beaver Trap. 341 00:10:39,726 --> 00:10:41,684 Yes, there is. 342 00:10:41,728 --> 00:10:43,294 In short, Commissioner Kelly's 343 00:10:43,338 --> 00:10:44,600 new initiative 344 00:10:44,644 --> 00:10:46,646 is a regressive, wrongheaded return 345 00:10:46,689 --> 00:10:50,301 to the NYPD's darkest days. 346 00:10:50,345 --> 00:10:51,302 How was that? 347 00:10:51,346 --> 00:10:52,826 Like watching a corpse 348 00:10:52,869 --> 00:10:55,567 wash up on shore, lifeless. 349 00:10:55,611 --> 00:10:57,265 Come on, you gotta pace it up, okay? 350 00:10:57,308 --> 00:10:58,483 You need to smile more. 351 00:10:58,527 --> 00:11:00,790 Energize the eyes! Gesticulate! 352 00:11:00,834 --> 00:11:02,681 You're describing the behavior of a crazy person. 353 00:11:02,705 --> 00:11:04,533 Am I? Because right now, 354 00:11:04,576 --> 00:11:06,491 you can't take your eyes off me. 355 00:11:06,535 --> 00:11:07,797 Oh, that must be 356 00:11:07,841 --> 00:11:09,383 the camera crew, here to set up the remote. 357 00:11:09,407 --> 00:11:10,670 Oh, but you're not ready. 358 00:11:10,713 --> 00:11:12,343 This is gonna be like "The King's Speech," 359 00:11:12,367 --> 00:11:13,823 before he lost all that weight or whatever. 360 00:11:13,847 --> 00:11:15,563 I haven't seen that movie. Oh, it's fine, Gina. 361 00:11:15,587 --> 00:11:17,807 I don't need any tricks. I've got the truth, 362 00:11:17,851 --> 00:11:19,374 and the truth is all I need 363 00:11:19,417 --> 00:11:20,723 to bring down... 364 00:11:20,767 --> 00:11:22,594 Commissioner Kelly! 365 00:11:22,638 --> 00:11:24,422 Hello. 366 00:11:24,466 --> 00:11:26,400 So, Hitchcock, what's the deal with the secret van? 367 00:11:26,424 --> 00:11:27,774 Oh, nothing. It's where I sleep 368 00:11:27,817 --> 00:11:28,818 during my divorces. 369 00:11:28,862 --> 00:11:30,211 If this van's a-rocking, 370 00:11:30,254 --> 00:11:31,647 my ex-wife's a-locking... 371 00:11:31,691 --> 00:11:32,822 Me, out of her house. 372 00:11:32,866 --> 00:11:34,258 Catchy. 373 00:11:34,302 --> 00:11:35,695 What are we doing here, Jake? 374 00:11:35,738 --> 00:11:37,237 What are we even looking for? Whatever it is 375 00:11:37,261 --> 00:11:38,915 that Hitchcock's trying to hide from us. 376 00:11:38,959 --> 00:11:41,352 I'd imagine he'd be hiding everything in here from us. 377 00:11:41,396 --> 00:11:43,441 It's a van of horrors. Yeah, I know. 378 00:11:43,485 --> 00:11:45,748 I saw the bucket of male body butter, 379 00:11:45,792 --> 00:11:47,707 and her. But my gut tells me 380 00:11:47,750 --> 00:11:49,230 there's a smoking gun in here. 381 00:11:49,273 --> 00:11:50,555 It's like you want them to be guilty. 382 00:11:50,579 --> 00:11:51,711 I don't. I just want 383 00:11:51,754 --> 00:11:52,905 to know what happened, unlike you, 384 00:11:52,929 --> 00:11:54,211 who doesn't want them to be guilty, 385 00:11:54,235 --> 00:11:55,715 no matter what the truth is. 386 00:11:55,758 --> 00:11:57,388 I'm not an idiot just because I have a heart. 387 00:11:57,412 --> 00:11:58,519 Well, your heart just might be an idiot, 388 00:11:58,543 --> 00:12:00,415 because voilà! 389 00:12:00,458 --> 00:12:01,784 So many smells. Shouldn't have gone 390 00:12:01,808 --> 00:12:03,244 for the flourish. Wait, is that- 391 00:12:03,287 --> 00:12:04,724 - The fourth bag from the picture. 392 00:12:04,767 --> 00:12:08,553 Same logo, same stain under the handle, and... 393 00:12:08,597 --> 00:12:10,207 It's empty. They're guilty! 394 00:12:10,251 --> 00:12:11,556 Nuh-uh. Not necessarily. 395 00:12:11,600 --> 00:12:13,040 I mean, there could be a very good... 396 00:12:14,646 --> 00:12:16,474 Damn it. We're trapped! 397 00:12:16,518 --> 00:12:17,798 We're trapped in the Beaver Trap! 398 00:12:17,824 --> 00:12:19,303 We're the beavers! 399 00:12:19,347 --> 00:12:20,391 We're the beavers! 400 00:12:24,482 --> 00:12:25,962 It won't budge. 401 00:12:26,006 --> 00:12:27,113 I can't believe we let Hitchcock and Scully 402 00:12:27,137 --> 00:12:28,095 get the drop on us. 403 00:12:28,138 --> 00:12:29,096 It's like being outsmarted 404 00:12:29,139 --> 00:12:30,097 by a couple of tomatoes. 405 00:12:30,140 --> 00:12:31,185 I'm the tomato. 406 00:12:31,228 --> 00:12:32,447 I was wrong about them, 407 00:12:32,490 --> 00:12:33,946 and I'm probably wrong about Dragomir. 408 00:12:33,970 --> 00:12:34,928 I'm too nice. 409 00:12:34,971 --> 00:12:36,538 I let every random jerk 410 00:12:36,581 --> 00:12:38,453 suckle at the teat of my human kindness. 411 00:12:38,496 --> 00:12:39,584 Gross. Now please 412 00:12:39,628 --> 00:12:41,195 hand me that mannequin's leg. 413 00:12:41,238 --> 00:12:42,955 There were so many warning signs about Dragomir. 414 00:12:42,979 --> 00:12:44,259 Nikolaj had never heard of him... 415 00:12:44,285 --> 00:12:45,479 - He's 45. - He asked for money. 416 00:12:45,503 --> 00:12:46,853 - He's 45. - He didn't have 417 00:12:46,896 --> 00:12:48,202 - a birth certificate. - He's 45. 418 00:12:48,245 --> 00:12:49,483 - He looked older than 15. - He's 45. 419 00:12:49,507 --> 00:12:51,031 Fine. He was 45. 420 00:12:51,074 --> 00:12:53,163 I'm just a sucker, trapped in a creepy sex van. 421 00:12:53,207 --> 00:12:54,469 Don't say that. It's not true. 422 00:12:54,512 --> 00:12:56,384 You're no longer trapped in a van. 423 00:13:00,170 --> 00:13:02,346 Oh, crap. They took our car. 424 00:13:02,390 --> 00:13:03,608 All right, I'll just call them 425 00:13:03,652 --> 00:13:05,132 and beg them to turn themselves in. 426 00:13:05,175 --> 00:13:07,134 Oh, no. I left my phone in the car. 427 00:13:07,177 --> 00:13:08,831 I know it's under one of their butts. 428 00:13:08,875 --> 00:13:10,026 Ooh, if they have your phone, 429 00:13:10,050 --> 00:13:11,399 we can track where they're going. 430 00:13:11,442 --> 00:13:13,967 I have "Find My Phone" set up to track you. 431 00:13:14,010 --> 00:13:15,161 What? I do that for all my friends, 432 00:13:15,185 --> 00:13:16,491 not just you. 433 00:13:16,534 --> 00:13:17,622 Show me. 434 00:13:17,666 --> 00:13:19,407 There's no time! Look, 435 00:13:19,450 --> 00:13:21,235 they're headed south on the Belt Parkway. 436 00:13:21,278 --> 00:13:22,236 Ooh, check what exit they're taking. 437 00:13:22,279 --> 00:13:23,585 Marine Park. 438 00:13:23,628 --> 00:13:25,500 Both: They're going to Wing Slutz! 439 00:13:25,543 --> 00:13:27,086 But how do we get there? We don't have a car. 440 00:13:27,110 --> 00:13:28,633 But we do have a van. 441 00:13:31,375 --> 00:13:32,570 Yeah, we should have taken a Lyft. 442 00:13:32,594 --> 00:13:33,595 I feel like a predator. 443 00:13:33,638 --> 00:13:35,031 This isn't our car! 444 00:13:35,075 --> 00:13:36,226 - It's a loaner. - We respect women! 445 00:13:36,250 --> 00:13:37,425 I'm still with her! 446 00:13:37,468 --> 00:13:39,427 So you are doing a TV interview? 447 00:13:39,470 --> 00:13:41,429 That's cool. Why are you smiling? 448 00:13:41,472 --> 00:13:43,102 'Cause he's one of those friendly villains, 449 00:13:43,126 --> 00:13:45,128 like the Verizon guy who defected to Sprint. 450 00:13:45,172 --> 00:13:46,453 If you're angry, come out and say it. 451 00:13:46,477 --> 00:13:48,262 I'm not angry. I'm just curious 452 00:13:48,305 --> 00:13:49,567 about what all this means. 453 00:13:49,611 --> 00:13:51,023 It's not often that one of our captains 454 00:13:51,047 --> 00:13:53,006 makes an unapproved media appearance. 455 00:13:53,049 --> 00:13:54,616 - It's fun. - I plan on using 456 00:13:54,659 --> 00:13:56,594 this interview to criticize you and your policies. 457 00:13:56,618 --> 00:13:59,142 Okay. That's your prerogative. 458 00:13:59,186 --> 00:14:00,448 No, don't chuckle. 459 00:14:00,491 --> 00:14:02,276 A frown is a more appropriate response. 460 00:14:02,319 --> 00:14:03,886 - I like you, Raymond. - No, you don't. 461 00:14:03,930 --> 00:14:05,409 I do! And I just came down here 462 00:14:05,453 --> 00:14:07,561 to tell you that if you go through with this interview, 463 00:14:07,585 --> 00:14:09,370 I have some real fun ideas 464 00:14:09,413 --> 00:14:11,894 about ways to spice up life at the Nine-Nine. 465 00:14:11,938 --> 00:14:13,567 I don't like your threats, and I don't like 466 00:14:13,591 --> 00:14:15,482 the cheery manner in which you've chosen to deliver them. 467 00:14:15,506 --> 00:14:17,378 Well, I'm just a cheery guy. 468 00:14:17,421 --> 00:14:19,554 - You're a snake. - Okay. 469 00:14:19,597 --> 00:14:21,164 I'm a snake. 470 00:14:25,995 --> 00:14:27,388 Oh, no, they found us! 471 00:14:27,431 --> 00:14:29,018 Damn straight, we did. What were you thinking? 472 00:14:29,042 --> 00:14:31,218 They obviously weren't thinking about anyone, 473 00:14:31,261 --> 00:14:32,959 especially the one friend... me... 474 00:14:33,002 --> 00:14:34,501 Who had their backs and believed in them 475 00:14:34,525 --> 00:14:35,918 the whole time! 476 00:14:35,962 --> 00:14:37,180 Why is the little one so mad? 477 00:14:37,224 --> 00:14:38,375 He's going through something. 478 00:14:38,399 --> 00:14:40,009 Now stand up, wet wipe your hands, 479 00:14:40,053 --> 00:14:41,465 and put them behind your backs so we can cuff you. 480 00:14:41,489 --> 00:14:42,727 Oh, thank God. I'm so tired of running. 481 00:14:42,751 --> 00:14:44,405 - It's only been an hour. - Stop. 482 00:14:44,448 --> 00:14:45,972 They didn't do anything wrong. 483 00:14:46,015 --> 00:14:47,297 Excuse me, ma'am. This is police business. 484 00:14:47,321 --> 00:14:49,018 I know. I'm Donna, the manager here, 485 00:14:49,062 --> 00:14:50,585 but my real name's Marissa Costa. 486 00:14:50,628 --> 00:14:52,326 I'm Gio Costa's wife, 487 00:14:52,369 --> 00:14:53,675 and I'm the reason they're here. 488 00:14:53,718 --> 00:14:55,590 - You were the informant. - Yeah, I was. 489 00:14:55,633 --> 00:14:57,374 Marissa's the only reason we got Costa. 490 00:14:57,418 --> 00:14:58,985 And our captain screwed her over. 491 00:14:59,028 --> 00:15:00,440 He wouldn't put her in Witness Protection. 492 00:15:00,464 --> 00:15:01,944 So you did take the cash. You just 493 00:15:01,988 --> 00:15:03,554 didn't keep it. You gave it to her. 494 00:15:03,598 --> 00:15:05,271 We come down here and check on her periodically. 495 00:15:05,295 --> 00:15:06,751 Yeah, we never spoke, but if she put an extra wing 496 00:15:06,775 --> 00:15:08,274 in our slut bucket, it meant everything was okay. 497 00:15:08,298 --> 00:15:09,517 Wait, so I was right. 498 00:15:09,560 --> 00:15:11,084 Hitchcock and Scully are good people. 499 00:15:11,127 --> 00:15:12,452 You bet your nips we are, skid mark. 500 00:15:12,476 --> 00:15:13,956 Well, 501 00:15:14,000 --> 00:15:17,003 people are complicated. These two contain... 502 00:15:17,046 --> 00:15:18,439 - multitudes. - Yeah. 503 00:15:18,482 --> 00:15:19,570 Hey, guys. 504 00:15:19,614 --> 00:15:21,355 I just wanted to say 505 00:15:21,398 --> 00:15:22,617 that I talked to my squad, 506 00:15:22,660 --> 00:15:23,661 and we're sorry 507 00:15:23,705 --> 00:15:25,141 we've been so disrespectful 508 00:15:25,185 --> 00:15:26,447 - of your space. - Really? 509 00:15:26,490 --> 00:15:27,772 - What's going on here? - Nothing. 510 00:15:27,796 --> 00:15:29,276 We just want to make things right. 511 00:15:29,319 --> 00:15:31,408 You upstairs people are really great, 512 00:15:31,452 --> 00:15:33,280 and there's a lot we can learn from you. 513 00:15:33,323 --> 00:15:35,717 Well, that is true. We are pretty great, 514 00:15:35,760 --> 00:15:37,762 and you downstairs people are gonna figure it out. 515 00:15:37,806 --> 00:15:39,460 You're all right. Thanks, Terry. 516 00:15:39,503 --> 00:15:41,331 - Truce? - Truce. 517 00:15:41,375 --> 00:15:42,637 Now! 518 00:15:42,680 --> 00:15:44,291 What the hell? 519 00:15:44,334 --> 00:15:46,162 You thought the microwave was a mess before? 520 00:15:46,206 --> 00:15:48,425 Well, we just threw a whole fish in there. 521 00:15:48,469 --> 00:15:50,210 What happened to the truce? 522 00:15:50,253 --> 00:15:52,168 - The truce was crap. - You bet it was. 523 00:15:52,212 --> 00:15:53,648 Viva the downstairs people! 524 00:15:55,563 --> 00:15:57,478 What the hell was in that fish? 525 00:15:57,521 --> 00:15:59,045 I don't know. It's from the Gowanus. 526 00:15:59,088 --> 00:16:01,743 It probably ate a bunch of batteries. 527 00:16:01,786 --> 00:16:04,311 Diaz, what is going on? 528 00:16:04,354 --> 00:16:06,226 Commissioner Kelly is still in my office. 529 00:16:06,269 --> 00:16:07,662 I'm so sorry. I didn't know. 530 00:16:07,705 --> 00:16:09,316 We were just having a minor disagreement. 531 00:16:09,359 --> 00:16:10,665 Well, can it! 532 00:16:10,708 --> 00:16:12,580 I am struggling for the very soul 533 00:16:12,623 --> 00:16:14,060 of the NYPD, 534 00:16:14,103 --> 00:16:15,670 so please stop squabbling 535 00:16:15,713 --> 00:16:17,106 over these unimportant things. 536 00:16:17,150 --> 00:16:18,325 Of course, sir, 537 00:16:18,368 --> 00:16:19,326 but it's not unimportant. 538 00:16:19,369 --> 00:16:21,284 The overcrowding, the desks... 539 00:16:21,328 --> 00:16:22,503 It's affecting morale. 540 00:16:22,546 --> 00:16:24,244 Jeez, something smells funky. 541 00:16:24,287 --> 00:16:25,506 What happened here? 542 00:16:25,549 --> 00:16:27,073 Uh-oh. Was it a fight, 543 00:16:27,116 --> 00:16:28,596 because it's so crowded? 544 00:16:28,639 --> 00:16:30,032 I hope nothing else happens 545 00:16:30,076 --> 00:16:31,512 to make everything worse. 546 00:16:31,555 --> 00:16:33,055 Listen, Kelly, I'm going to do that interview, 547 00:16:33,079 --> 00:16:34,558 and you can't stop me, so go ahead. 548 00:16:34,602 --> 00:16:37,213 Cut our budget, close more of the building, 549 00:16:37,257 --> 00:16:39,824 open other fake IA investigations 550 00:16:39,868 --> 00:16:41,696 into my detectives. I didn't do that. 551 00:16:41,739 --> 00:16:43,698 No, the IA thing... Your detectives 552 00:16:43,741 --> 00:16:44,805 aren't under investigation, 553 00:16:44,829 --> 00:16:46,527 although it's not a bad idea. 554 00:16:46,570 --> 00:16:49,182 Hey, thanks for the suggestion. 555 00:16:49,225 --> 00:16:51,097 Excuse me. 556 00:16:51,140 --> 00:16:53,142 I need to make a call. 557 00:16:53,186 --> 00:16:54,535 Okay, thank you, sir. Hey, guys, 558 00:16:54,578 --> 00:16:56,252 I have something super important to tell you, 559 00:16:56,276 --> 00:16:57,557 but first, Scully, you have a Hitler sauce moustache. 560 00:16:57,581 --> 00:16:58,800 Thank you. Go on. 561 00:16:58,843 --> 00:17:00,082 Internal Affairs isn't actually 562 00:17:00,106 --> 00:17:01,107 investigating your case. 563 00:17:01,150 --> 00:17:02,369 That call you got wasn't real. 564 00:17:02,412 --> 00:17:04,284 What? The guy on the phone 565 00:17:04,327 --> 00:17:05,391 sounded legit. He had a very deep voice. 566 00:17:05,415 --> 00:17:06,721 If it's not IA, who is it? 567 00:17:06,764 --> 00:17:07,722 My guess is someone who wanted us 568 00:17:07,765 --> 00:17:08,766 to lead them to Marissa. 569 00:17:11,247 --> 00:17:13,075 Which, apparently, we just did. 570 00:17:16,818 --> 00:17:19,777 That's Gio Costa. How'd he get out of jail? 571 00:17:19,821 --> 00:17:21,407 Probably for good behavior. He had really great manners. 572 00:17:21,431 --> 00:17:23,018 Yeah, he and his gigantic gun look like real sweethearts. 573 00:17:23,042 --> 00:17:24,391 - Noice. - All right, 574 00:17:24,434 --> 00:17:25,803 we gotta get out of here. Is there a back exit? 575 00:17:25,827 --> 00:17:26,934 - Through the kitchen. - Great. 576 00:17:26,958 --> 00:17:28,110 All right, listen up, everybody. 577 00:17:28,134 --> 00:17:29,285 We're NYPD. If you could all please 578 00:17:29,309 --> 00:17:30,832 head to the back exit immediately. 579 00:17:30,875 --> 00:17:32,051 Leave the wings, Hitchcock. 580 00:17:32,094 --> 00:17:33,400 No! 581 00:17:35,228 --> 00:17:38,100 Look, Jake, it's the slut sauce! 582 00:17:38,144 --> 00:17:39,623 - It's perfect! - Hey, guys, 583 00:17:39,667 --> 00:17:41,210 we gotta leave, and we gotta leave right now. 584 00:17:41,234 --> 00:17:42,931 - Charles, let's go. - Negative. 585 00:17:42,974 --> 00:17:44,430 I count three, possibly four gunmen out there. 586 00:17:44,454 --> 00:17:45,977 All right, no one panic. 587 00:17:46,021 --> 00:17:47,346 I'm sure they didn't even see us come in here. 588 00:17:47,370 --> 00:17:49,068 We saw you go back there. 589 00:17:49,111 --> 00:17:50,634 Okay, so I was wrong about that. 590 00:17:50,678 --> 00:17:52,134 I'm gonna go around back and cut them off. 591 00:17:52,158 --> 00:17:56,075 Knock this door down, now. 592 00:17:56,118 --> 00:17:57,313 All right, here's the way I see it. 593 00:17:57,337 --> 00:17:58,662 We gotta break out the back entrance 594 00:17:58,686 --> 00:17:59,991 and get these people to the van. 595 00:18:00,035 --> 00:18:01,186 Okay, everyone, just follow my lead. 596 00:18:01,210 --> 00:18:02,820 No, we got you into this mess. 597 00:18:02,864 --> 00:18:04,276 We'll get you out of it. Follow our lead. 598 00:18:04,300 --> 00:18:05,736 There are armed men out there. 599 00:18:05,780 --> 00:18:07,149 We don't even have our bulletproof vests. 600 00:18:07,173 --> 00:18:08,348 We can use the slut sauce. 601 00:18:08,391 --> 00:18:10,132 That's insane. It's not even solid. 602 00:18:10,176 --> 00:18:11,457 The bullets will go right through it. 603 00:18:11,481 --> 00:18:13,266 If you don't think the slut sauce is solid, 604 00:18:13,309 --> 00:18:15,442 then you might want to talk to my rock-hard arteries. 605 00:18:15,485 --> 00:18:17,313 We're doing this, and that's final. 606 00:18:17,357 --> 00:18:20,925 Scully, it's time to sauce up. 607 00:18:24,973 --> 00:18:26,670 - Why'd you stop yelling? - Look. 608 00:18:28,368 --> 00:18:30,152 Oh, thank god. 609 00:18:30,196 --> 00:18:31,806 My wife and my dad are here. 610 00:18:31,849 --> 00:18:33,112 I mean, Captain Dad. 611 00:18:33,155 --> 00:18:34,374 I mean, I know who my dad is. 612 00:18:34,417 --> 00:18:35,940 It's you. Hi, Amy. 613 00:18:35,984 --> 00:18:37,222 SWAT just cleared out the dining room. 614 00:18:37,246 --> 00:18:38,987 - They got everyone. - Copy that. 615 00:18:39,030 --> 00:18:40,269 All right, Charles, you can bring everyone out. 616 00:18:40,293 --> 00:18:42,033 The Nine-Nine is here. 617 00:18:42,077 --> 00:18:44,340 See, everyone, I told you we had it all under control. 618 00:18:44,384 --> 00:18:45,689 There was no need to panic. 619 00:18:45,733 --> 00:18:47,082 You're dead, Marissa. 620 00:18:49,215 --> 00:18:53,044 No! 621 00:18:56,091 --> 00:18:57,451 Are you guys okay? Did you get hit? 622 00:18:57,484 --> 00:18:59,225 No. It hit the tub, 623 00:18:59,268 --> 00:19:00,376 but the bullet didn't make it through. 624 00:19:00,400 --> 00:19:01,488 The slut sauce... 625 00:19:01,531 --> 00:19:02,793 It saved you. 626 00:19:02,837 --> 00:19:04,012 You bet your nips it did, 627 00:19:04,055 --> 00:19:05,100 skid mark. 628 00:19:05,144 --> 00:19:06,710 Oh, Hitchcock. 629 00:19:06,754 --> 00:19:08,451 You suck, man. 630 00:19:08,495 --> 00:19:10,758 So I spoke to Internal Affairs, 631 00:19:10,801 --> 00:19:13,500 and since Hitchcock and Scully did steal that money, 632 00:19:13,543 --> 00:19:14,825 even though it was to help someone, 633 00:19:14,849 --> 00:19:16,198 there have to be consequences. 634 00:19:16,242 --> 00:19:17,939 Both: Desk duty, desk duty, desk duty... 635 00:19:17,982 --> 00:19:19,070 One year of desk duty. 636 00:19:19,114 --> 00:19:20,115 Both: Yeah! 637 00:19:20,159 --> 00:19:22,204 Oh, I mean, oh, no. 638 00:19:22,248 --> 00:19:24,075 Thanks for getting there so fast today, sir. 639 00:19:24,119 --> 00:19:25,401 Were you able to still do your interview? 640 00:19:25,425 --> 00:19:27,992 He did not. However, I did so. 641 00:19:28,036 --> 00:19:29,429 The real question is 642 00:19:29,472 --> 00:19:31,170 what are police? 643 00:19:31,213 --> 00:19:32,997 I'm sorry. Who are you again? 644 00:19:33,041 --> 00:19:35,174 They said they've never had more viewer complaints. 645 00:19:35,217 --> 00:19:36,479 Controversial and loving it. 646 00:19:38,133 --> 00:19:40,135 - Oh. - Squad, I want to apologize. 647 00:19:40,179 --> 00:19:42,442 I have been acting as though nothing mattered 648 00:19:42,485 --> 00:19:44,008 except my pursuit of justice, 649 00:19:44,052 --> 00:19:45,421 but seeing my people in danger today 650 00:19:45,445 --> 00:19:47,490 made me realize I was being short-sighted. 651 00:19:47,534 --> 00:19:49,318 I do give a hoot. 652 00:19:49,362 --> 00:19:51,102 I give a hoot about all of you. 653 00:19:51,146 --> 00:19:52,254 Are we gonna keep saying "hoots"? Is this forever? 654 00:19:52,278 --> 00:19:53,453 - I pray not. - I'm gonna keep 655 00:19:53,496 --> 00:19:54,976 pushing back against John Kelly, 656 00:19:55,019 --> 00:19:56,978 but not at your expense. Thank you, sir, 657 00:19:57,021 --> 00:19:58,284 and we're going to stop 658 00:19:58,327 --> 00:19:59,937 bickering with the upstairs people. 659 00:19:59,981 --> 00:20:02,026 No, Amy. We're all upstairs people now. 660 00:20:02,070 --> 00:20:04,246 Thanks, Terry. 661 00:20:04,290 --> 00:20:05,334 Mmkay. I clearly missed 662 00:20:05,378 --> 00:20:07,162 a whole thing there. 663 00:20:07,206 --> 00:20:08,424 Hey, man. I just want to say 664 00:20:08,468 --> 00:20:10,078 I'm sorry I didn't listen to you. 665 00:20:10,121 --> 00:20:11,577 I was wrong about Hitchcock and Scully. 666 00:20:11,601 --> 00:20:13,951 No, you were right. I am too trusting sometimes. 667 00:20:13,995 --> 00:20:15,866 I did a little digging on Dragomir. 668 00:20:15,910 --> 00:20:18,173 Turns out, he's not 15. He's... 669 00:20:18,217 --> 00:20:19,435 - 103. - 34. 670 00:20:19,479 --> 00:20:21,002 But the orphanage confirmed 671 00:20:21,045 --> 00:20:23,047 he is actually Nikolaj's half-brother. 672 00:20:23,091 --> 00:20:24,484 Anyway, we're taking it slow. 673 00:20:24,527 --> 00:20:26,070 In a few months, he'll come out to visit. 674 00:20:26,094 --> 00:20:27,922 Hey, thanks for having our back today. 675 00:20:27,965 --> 00:20:29,465 These are from the old studs of the Nine-Nine 676 00:20:29,489 --> 00:20:31,404 - to the new studs. - Aww. 677 00:20:31,447 --> 00:20:33,101 - Nice. - Nice. 678 00:20:33,144 --> 00:20:34,383 Well, I think they drank out of these. 679 00:20:34,407 --> 00:20:35,427 They're half-empty. Definitely. 680 00:20:35,451 --> 00:20:36,452 Hitchcock's contact lens 681 00:20:36,496 --> 00:20:37,932 is floating in mine, 682 00:20:37,975 --> 00:20:39,301 which once again begs the question, 683 00:20:39,325 --> 00:20:41,109 what happened to those guys? 684 00:20:41,152 --> 00:20:43,546 I mean, when did it all fall apart? 685 00:20:43,590 --> 00:20:45,244 Hey, Donna, just want to make sure 686 00:20:45,287 --> 00:20:48,116 you're okay here working at... Wing Slutz. 687 00:20:48,159 --> 00:20:49,552 Yeah. It's a good job, 688 00:20:49,596 --> 00:20:51,119 and I'm excited about my new life. 689 00:20:51,162 --> 00:20:52,338 - Thanks. - Our pleas. 690 00:20:52,381 --> 00:20:53,861 Well, we're gonna go hit the gym 691 00:20:53,904 --> 00:20:55,384 for the second time today. Wait. 692 00:20:55,428 --> 00:20:58,431 You need some protein to fuel those hard bodies. 693 00:20:58,474 --> 00:21:00,476 - It's on me. - Ah, what the heck. 694 00:21:00,520 --> 00:21:04,437 One wing can't hurt. 695 00:21:06,308 --> 00:21:09,485 ♪ Take my breath away 696 00:21:14,925 --> 00:21:18,973 ♪ Take my breath away 697 00:21:23,107 --> 00:21:25,066 Fremulon. 698 00:21:25,109 --> 00:21:27,068 Not a doctor. Shh.